Cutest Car

This hamster-powered car was among the inventions at the 26th Tokyo Idea Olympics, the idea of which is to "encourage fun and exciting technological breakthroughs".

I want it.



Sehr and also ganz amusing to the point where it isn't amusing anymore.

Today these Cuntricans came to our school to chat about extra-curricular activities. That is, bible class. And they called the bible "The Book" as if it is the only book in existence. I was crying from laughter. And then these "teenagers" (as they were called by the Cuntricans) came on the stage to do hip hop dancing. With bandanas on.

And when it was finished the guy got on the stage and said "If this was America the 'kids' would be dancing around, why aren't you?" or something. No one mentioned that we would probably be shot down if we ever attempted such a thing.

It was a good day.

Pending crisis

Things that are very,very wrong with my life:

1. I have to actually read and analyse the poems of Keats, who probably never had sex and was feeling sorry for himself throughout his life, as he knew he was going to die.
2. Malaga is the city of crapness and I have nothing fun or new to do this weekend.
3. My throat feels funny. I have probably caught pneumonia from Rob.
4. My newly painted red nails will probably fuck up soon or chip in one day.
5. I have that disease when you want to buy everything that exists but I cannot, for obvious reasons (funding, storage...etc).
6. Even if I do go to the land of wienerwurstchen, I will never find someone hot to snog. Never.
7. I want a Japanese baby and I can't get one, also for obvious reasons.
8. I need to paint my toenails also, but cannot, as I have already painted my hands, and painting my nails now will fuck up my hands.
9. I want a plantation with German slaves, and cannot get one, for obvious reasons.
10. I cannot find a pair of my.. er.. breeches? :D Cut off type trouser thingies. Yes. Those.

Anyway. I need to go find some seaweed now. For obvious reasons.

Alexis Bledel

Why is Alexis Bledel in every sodding thing I watch? And why are all of those things that she acts in shit? Why?

My mother has just sprayed me in the eye with fucking eu de cologne. She was like "I'm sorry, fucking hell, take it easy" when I yelped with the pain of it all. What was I supposed to do? Thank her for washing my eye out with cologne? It has gone red. My eye, that is. I will probably be blinded, as part of the amazing package that is my life.

I am going to wear flip flops to school tomorrow, and see who I can piss off.

Hero

That ^ is what I would want to look like had I been a superhero =D. Perhaps in colour though. I couldn't be arsed colouring this one. She even has a whip. To whip priests and hookers. At sea. Yeah.

The day after tomorrow is the day I begin going to school for another whole year of my life. Is it not sad that we cannot decide the course of our lives? I mean, I could leave school and become a hula dancer or something, but then I would probably be sehr and ganz poor, which is sehr bad. Because that would mean I would never own anything from Marc Jacobs. In which case there isn't much point in living, much less hula dancing.



Heh. That must be how spiderman likes his fisting. Superfisting. For superheroes. Ahahaha.

10 Commandments

www.lowbright.com/Comics/10Commandments/10Commandments.htm

Ahahaha. Ha.

Back and pissed

I am back to the shitty waters of Malaga. I have some amusing thingies to note.

Women in the West who have long been battling both themselves and the natural order to be “superwomen” are finding that banging their heads on the glass ceiling is giving them more than a headache. They are finding themselves on a merry-go-round that will not stop. Their makeup and their hair must be perfect; their size must be unrealistically thin; their children must be perfect, talented, and high achievers; their houses must be spotless; and all this must be achieved in the stolen hours between working and sleeping.
- Islam Online

Hmm... Yes, in Islam there are no such problems. Women shouldn't work or wear make up and as they cover their bodies anyway, they can grow into fat lard barrels without much concern. How tasteful and fulfilling a life.

Islam goes much further than just recognition; it clearly defines the roles that women play and states rights and obligations with clarity and common sense.

Oh yes, it decides on what your whole life is to be beforehand, just because you were born with a vagina instead of a penis. Oh well. Men have bigger brains. Just like whales. ^^

The role of a mother in bringing up children is greater than that of a father. She is responsible for their emotional, behavioral, and intellectual development. She is responsible for instilling a love of Islam in them, especially in the early formative years. When a woman understands the teachings of Islam and her own role in life, she understands her complete responsibility for the upbringing of her children.

Yes, if the child becomes a raging homosexual, it is the fault of the mother, and she should be beaten by all means. After all, people become gay because they are brought up to be, aren't they? =|

The lives of Muslim women must be guided only by the precepts of the Qur’an and the Sunnah. We must not be fooled by slogans such as “times have changed.”

Oh yes, repeat after me, fellow occult members: We are inferior. Times have not changed. It is still the year 1000 and not 2005.

This must have been written by some guy with a beard. But then again, indoctrination is a wonderful thing.